If there was ever was an indicator I made the Right Choice when it came to switching to a Mac and worshipping at the Altar of Steve, my faith in Apple ratcheted up several notches last night as I helped my mother-in-law get her new laptop set up.  Obviously all Windows-based PCs come with Vista now and while I could go on a rant about why Vista is truly a misstep by Microsoft for so many reasons, I don't want to bore the non-techie crowd by going on that particular vent.

So let's focus on something we all can relate to -- packaging created by sadists.  When it comes to Microsoft's new packaging design, they have far surpassed the third world cretins who designed the "50 steel twist ties per child's toy package" design that creates hours of work for parents just to free the toy from its bonds.  By the end of Christmas day, most parents fingers are worn down to the nubs from this unforseen task.

I'd like to think I have a good amount of common sense.  If something is relatively tricky, I can usually figure out the puzzle or riddle after a certain amount of thinking.  But this Microsoft Office package the discs came in?  The discs in these packages are more secure than files with top level security in the Pentagon.  At first glance, it seems as though it's a relatively simple snipping of some tape on both sides, pulling a little red tab and then squeezing some indentations.  WRONG.  If you are not equipped with 3, possibly 4,  hands (and most of us aren't), it's going to be a challenge to obtain access to the innards.  We never would have figured out the DaVinci Code had the secrets been housed in this Chamber of Security.

So here was myself, my wife and my mother in law - all three of us college graduates trying to force open this package.  It was about this time I realized I needed to open one of those bottles of Victory Old Horizontal barleywine (10.5% alcohol that will literally leave you "horizontal" if you have more than one or two) in order to calm my nerves and avoid beginning a tirade worthy of dialogue in Goodfellas.  After finally breaking open the package without damaging the discs, we finally were on our way to installing this overpriced software that is vulnerable to any hacker with a sense of purpose.

Compare this installation to when I purchased a copy of iWork when I bought my Macbook.  In addition to it being less than $70 (compared to $400+ for this version of Office Pro, although she does get a lot more software with the Pro version), the discs came in this beautifully packaged thin box that opened up within seconds.  I can save any of my files in MS Office format so Windows Captives can view my docs and I can open theirs in my much-cheaper-and-just-as-good software.

Maybe I'll spend another blog post ranting on how much I'm still in love with my Mac and will never go back to Windows for my home use anytime soon but in the meantime, enjoy my Murder Fantasy of the implements I was willing to resort to had i not been able to open that damn package.  The upgrade discs that users need to upgrade to Vista also come in this same packaging.  If you haven't upgraded to Vista yet, at least wait until they release Service Pack 1 (now in Beta).

In case you're wondering, yes that is my daughter's Dora the Explorer bubble wand.  I'm not sure how I would have used it as an instrument of torture but I would have found a way.