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 Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch Minimize
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Posted by: James 3/12/2008 10:21 AM

This might be one of the most cringe-inducing stories I have ever had forwarded to me.  Every guy who reads the text below will know what I’m talking about.  By the way, the player’s last name is pronounced “PEE-ay”, not “Pie”.

Cubs' Pie out 3-5 days

By Paul Sullivan, 3:23 p.m.

MARYVALE, Ariz. --  Centerfielder Felix Pie will undergo surgery on Monday to correct a personal problem and miss 3-5 days, manager Lou Piniella announced before the Cubs-Brewers game.

Pie is suffering from what's called testicular torsion, or, in layman's terms, a twisted testicle. It happened early in camp, but Pie had the problem reduced manually, sources said, and was able to continue playing. He was scheduled to have the corrective surgery on the Cubs off-day next Monday, but when Pie reported to camp with soreness Monday, the Cubs decided to get the procedure done today.

The surgery involves sewing the outer layer of the testicle to the scrotum wall. The Cubs said it was a minor procedure, and if the problem was not corrected soon, Pie would risk losing the testicle.

It's not known how Pie incurred the injury, but it's not uncommon. Some men are more susceptible to it than others, but it usually happens in late adolescence.

Piniella delicately called it Pie's "situation" and said it shouldn't keep him from competing for the centerfield job. Pie is leading Sam Fuld, who will get most of the playing time in Pie's absence.

 

I really don’t know how I’d react if this happened to me.  I’d be tempted to simply tell the doctor to lop it off.  I’d still have one left and I’m done filling up this world with any more children anyway.  The bottom line is that it simply isn't your day when the doctor's diagnosis includes the words "your balls" and "torsion" together in the same sentence.

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Comments (8)   Add Comment
Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Blaser on 3/12/2008 10:26 AM
OH, my aching change purse....

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Erich on 3/12/2008 3:44 PM
Ack, that actually caused me some discomfort just reading it

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Jason's Mom on 3/12/2008 4:54 PM
"Pie had the problem reduced manually"<br><br>Aincha glad you're not the Cubs' trainer, who gets to help the guys with problems like these?

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Kevin on 3/12/2008 9:18 PM
I fear the fact that walking into a cold air conditioned building on a very hot summer day can do this to you. If you don't believe me read the Wikipedia link in the article. Imagine, you pass through the revolving door only to double over in front of everyone grabbing your nutz! GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Milo on 3/12/2008 9:52 PM
Dude - is the baby okay now? the world wants to know, or maybe just me.

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By James on 3/13/2008 9:05 AM
Milo, Katie is doing a little better but she's going to see a specialist today who can hopefully give us some help with Katie's severe reflux and resulting lack of sleep due to that pain.

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Milo on 3/13/2008 10:49 AM
milk allergy?

Re: Ouch, Ouch, Ouch and more Ouch    By Syl on 3/14/2008 8:53 AM
I don't care how *he* pronounces it, he'll always be 'Mmmmmm Pie...' to me.


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